To start with, dating isn’t easy, but since the invention of the internet, we’ve had internet dating. Now that this should be taken without a pinch of salt, or actually, quite a lot of salt. Most of these sites are either collections of clicking yes or no on people to whether you find them attractive or not. Think that thing Mark Zuckerberg made in The Social Network before Facebook. These are your basic sex hook up applications and sites that hide under the guise of allowing you to know the person once you’ve decided if their looks are more important than any level of intellectual worth.
Following from this, some websites have questions. The best of these go from anything from deep questions, about sex, love and animal preference to the more obscure. While you’re being asked if you prefer coffee or tea, you might also be asked about fetishes and occasionally a question on what a quotation from Romeo and Juliet means. That wasn’t an exaggeration by the way, that actually happened on one.
The horrifying questions are normally set up like this, “Would you be happy if your partner hated a race different to your own.” More worryingly is that you can check peoples profiles to the answer of this question and most people would allow for lifelong bliss with a racist. Nothing says love like white supremacy, or so I’m told.
I’m sure most people’s connections with dating sites is very limited and wouldn’t get to enjoy the terrifying nuances that come with a dating profile, so perhaps these things seem rare and unlikely. We all see the adverts on the TV and notice how stunning, yet neurotic they all are. We also often decide that we aren’t those type of people, we are all three dimensional people who can’t be contained on a webpage, and honestly this shows. Most dating profiles other than the preference on if you’re a racist, homophobe or sexist is a mess of peoples panic as they’re asked to explain themselves.
Most of the time it falls down to being fun or quirky, and everyone is nice. Not that this takes away from people, but this is where the ton of salt should be taken. It’s hard to discover who a person really is online, but even more daunting is that we’ve given it a go and it seems we’re all psychopaths and creepers.
The final part of my thoughts on dating websites is the actual dating or contacting people part. Messaging a complete random stranger is yet again another babble-fest where you might as well be screaming “Love Me!” at the screen until someone eventually agrees and you go out. It’s all mostly small talk and you rarely hit it off with anyone. Also from reading enough of the ladies profiles, I imagine most are jaded by the constant ask for nudes, sex or general dirty talk. This makes it somewhat hard to be genuinely nice when the contract of having a dating profile as a male seems to be that you are instantly a creep.
Anyway, these were just some of my thoughts on the whole process. I think I might just want to keep my dating to face to face stuff now, or maybe just remove the human aspect and chat with a bot instead.